I wake up resigned. It’s Saturday and I feel a little depressed. I start thinking about all my friends the farmers’ market vendors. Will they wonder where I am? I sure miss them. The farmers’ market is my church, my favorite place in the world to be. I don’t know what to do with myself and keep wondering if there are persimmons in the market yet. I convince myself that they are making their debut today and I’m missing it. Then I feel like a baby.
When food is your one luxury, the only thing you spend money on and it’s also your entertainment, what do you have left? What will I do with myself on Saturday with no shopping and cooking? I don’t feel like myself. I feel like I’m living in a world devoid of color and I start to fantasize about going shoe shopping. I snap myself out of that really quickly and make breakfast.
Breakfast: 1 egg; 1 piece of toast; 1 wedge of melon
I suddenly realize that the bread tastes really sweet. And it’s not even a really cheap brand, but it’s definitely got sugar in it. My taste buds are off or something. In Hunger Challenge land all foodstuffs contain sugar.
I spend the morning cleaning the house and then a friend comes over with some figs from her tree. I give her some cucumbers from my garden and some jam that I’ve made. I eat a couple of figs. It’s crazy to turn down free food. I’m trying to find the line between really challenging myself and being so contrived that it’s ridiculous. I’m feeling apprehensive again because it’s Saturday and there are family activities planned involving children and meals out. I’m really not sure how I will deal with it yet.
Lunch: A bowl of the emergency lentil/rice/bok choy soup and a tortilla with butter. Really good. A lot better than those enchiladas. I also eat half of a pear with peanut butter.
In the afternoon we go bowling with family. Everybody gets popcorn. It’s easy for me to resist even though I’m hungry. Then, we go to a Mexican restaurant that I really like. Now I’m really hungry. I think about just giving in and then decide that that would definitely be crossing the line I mention above even if others pay for my dinner. I mean this is supposed to be a challenge. So I order water and sit there. And sit there. And sit there. I’m really hungry. After holding out for 30 minutes I eat some of the free chips with salsa. There’s that line again. I mean really. They are free. I’m sitting there. And I’m hungry. The bill comes and I start to automatically reach for my wallet. Then I realize I didn’t eat anything and I feel sort of crazily gleeful.
Dinner: I heat up two enchiladas and a scoop of beans. The beans taste good but I have to choke the enchiladas down. The cilantro doesn’t help. Do I really have to eat these one more time? I am relieved when dinner (and Saturday) is over.